I live with this limiting thought: “my existence causes harm.”
That the extraction and creation of all the resources my one human body requires to exist –food, gasoline, gadgets, water, shelter, heat, and more – all of this causes harm to the Earth and to human and non-human beings.
Knowing this can be emotionally overwhelming at times. And it definitely has limited my ability to step into my full purpose for being on this beautiful planet for much of my life.
Recently my friend, also a healer, asked me, “Who would you be without that thought?”
As I was contemplating this, the Goddess Lilith (one of my spirit guides) reached into my brain, in that space behind my eyeballs that felt centrally located, and plucked out an almond-in-its-shell sized obsidian stone which represented “my existence causes harm.”
She placed it in my hand. I heard the word amygdala.
I knew amygdala is the name of a part of the brain, but I didn’t know what part, where it is located, or what it looks like. (Turns out it is roughly an almond-in-its-shell size and shaped part in exactly that spot, which is responsible for emotional regulation, fear, anxiety, motivation and more.)
So, who would I be without this thought?
Feeling into that question yielded that I might be someone who did not need to incessantly be “doing.” I might be able to just “be” more.
And then I realized that my incessant doing is because I believe that I need to create more good than the harm I inevitably cause.
Without realizing it, I have held a belief that I have to create so much good that I offset the harm my existence causes.
And I was shown that I do not have to do that. I do not have to balance the scales of my existence to be equal or tipped in the direction of the good outweighing the harm.
I was shown that I can – in fact I must – live with the fact that my existence causes harm and my existence causes good.
I can do the good that I am able to do in this lifetime, and I don’t have to unbearably burden myself by trying to do so much good that the harm I cause is entirely made up for.
I know this is a more profound teaching than I’ve yet fully realized. I know it probably does not come across here as significantly as I am beginning to feel it. But I’m sharing it now in case it might shift something in you as well.
Can you feel into the sigh of relief of knowing that the good you cause in your existence does not have to outweigh the harm?
If you struggle with your existence causing harm, with what humans are doing to our shared planet and each other, I’d love to help. You can schedule a free Shamanic Exploration Session with me here:
https://calendly.com/sacral-transformations/shamanic-exploration-session
Betti Rooted Lionheart (she/her) is passionate about working with queer people, teens, healers, activists, change makers, and anyone who feels despair for the Earth and Humanity. She is a Shamanic healer, a spiritual empowerment activist, a Fire Priestess, a writer, a facilitator of the work that reconnects, a minister of the Church of Earth Healing, the mother of two sons, queer, and the founder of Braided Root Waters Healing Sanctuary in Trumansburg, NY. Betti offers powerfully transformative one-to-one Shamanic healing sessions (in-person and on-line) and loves to teach people to Shamanic journey. She is also a facilitator of Circles for Despair, rage, and wailing work. https://sacraltransformations.com/
Published in “The Community Voice” Rohnert Park, CA
